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http://collegecandy.com/2008/08/02/why-%e2%80%9ci-don%e2%80%99t-think-of-you-in-that-way%e2%80%9d-is-so-damn-complicated/http://

well kinda a woman's point of view-it seems she is still in college so maybe a mature- mature student.
However or I guess I should say "Whatever dude, we still think the same way"

OKay the link did not work- complete with the very hot very young man gosh I feel like an old pervie!

I have had, on multiple occasions, the uncomfortable conversation that always ends with the words I dont think of you in that way. I have sat down with many a guy friend to clarify that were just friends. I have explained to guys numerous times that I like to keep my friendships and my relationships separate, and that I dont date my friends. I always mean it when I say it. I always want to stick to it. But the line between friendships and relationships always seems to blur in my confused little world. Why is I dont think of you in that way so hard for me to say?
There have been several occasions this year where I have had to have this conversation. What troubles me the most is that I cant seem to avoid it. Im a huge flirt, especially when Ive had too many whiskey sours, so I can understand why some guys might get the wrong idea and think Im interested in more than just a shoulder to rest my head on when the room starts to get spinny. But even with guys I dont get super flirty with, I still have to have the conversation. Its always approached one of two ways:


The first is a situation in which I have heavily flirted with, or mildly hooked-up with, a guy friend and I have to explain to him that this doesnt mean were meant to settle down, get married, and procreate. The second situation, and the more annoying one because its unavoidable is the, How come we never hooked up? conversation.


Id like to clarify my position on this friendship/friends with benefits/relationship conundrum once and for all. Guys, listen up.

First things first we never hooked up because I never wanted to. Youre not my type. Get over it.

Second, The Ladder theory is absolute bullsh*t. Ive had many guy friends point me toward this folk psychology explanation of how men and women rank potential friends and lovers. Its bull. According to the theory, guys place women hierarchically on a ladder ranking them potential lover or potential friend, judging their sexual desirability first, as in, s hot, but not Jessica Alba hot, I give her a 7.


Women, reversely, place men they meet on one of two ladders: a ladder, for those they might sleep with, and a ladder, for those they just want to be friends with. I can tell you definitively right now that girls do not think this way. When we meet a guy we dont immediately categorize him as a potential anything. And when girls say, I just think of you as a friend, what were really saying is, I dont find you attractive. Were just trying to spare your feelings.

There, I said it.

When I flirt with you, its because I enjoy flirting, not because Im in love with you. When I hook-up with you, its because I want to hook-up with you, not because Im in love with you and want to have your babies. Its really that easy.

What it takes to get me to commit to a relationship is a lot more complicated now than it was when I was in school. Back then if I met a guy whom I was attracted to and who had at least one or two good personality traits (could make me laugh, was smart, wrote pretty poetry) that was enough to make me want to label him my Not so much anymore. A bad relationship can be a great learning experience. Ive had several bad relationships. Ive learnt enough. So when I say that I just want to be friends, its because I think wed have a learn something relationship. Im an adult now, I dont have time to learn things, Im just trying to pay my rent.
That being said, just because I want to be friends right now doesnt mean I wont change my mind later. I had the unfortunate experience this year of realizing that I had feelings for a guy friend way too late in our relationship. I had my window to turn our friends-with-benefits situation into a relationship, I decided that I wasnt into him in a boyfriend way, and I passed on the opportunity. Months later, I realized I was in love with him and it was way too late. Needless to say, were not friends anymore. I got my heart broken and I broke it all by myself.
I dont think of you in that way is, more often than not, a lie. Thats like a guy denying hes though about having sex with his female friends. Of course he has. He probably thinks about it all the time. Ive considered different dating possibilities among my friends, even when weve been friends for a while, and, yeah, Ive thought about what my guy friends would be like in bed. (Guys, youre not the only ones with dirty minds!)

So, guys, heres the deal, the next time I say to you, I dont think of you in that way, I mean one of two things:

A. Im not physically attracted to you. But Id still love it if we could hang out.

B. I care about you deeply as a friend and Im too mature to f*ck that up by trying to date you for a couple of weeks and then have it not work out. But you might want to check back in a few months because maybe Ill change my mind.

Its up to you to figure out if youre a group A guy or group B guy.

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Sounds like a lot of activity going on! While we understand the need for fans to say their goodbyes to MJ, we can't help but wonder... how will this all go down? The area is certain to be flooded with people wanting to pay their respects - but can security keep the chaos under control? And should such a viewing even have been allowed? And what about that 30-car LAPD escort just to get the body up there? Are us taxpayers paying for that?!
Our photographer adds: "All the carnival rides have been removed. The grass was finally being watered. The place was bustling with activity but it was definitely coming together - this old, dead property is coming alive again."
Neverland is about to turn into Graceland! Stay tuned for pix and more info, coming ASAP.

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