Holy sheer bikini, Batman! Id love to have a hot babe like this as the girl next door. She is so smoking hot that Im surprised her sheer white bikini doesnt just burn right off. Sometimes when you see a babe this beautiful in the face, their body is just okay. But not with this hot blonde bombshell! Shes got a big bubble butt that just wont quit! I think it could literally stop traffic.
Whoever invented the thong definitely had an ass like this in mind for it. The booty on this babe is sheer perfection. Ive stared far too long at it and now I just dont know what to say anymore. Oh hell, why say anymore.

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Regarding the effectiveness of dating websites Criteria for establishing test reliability are quite rigorous. Once relevant data are collected, the results are typically submitted to the scientific community for scrutiny. A peer-reviewed report (one vetted by other knowledgeable researchers in the field) is ultimately published in an academic journal.
Several online services are now built entirely around claims that they have powerful, effective, matchmaking testsmost notably eHarmony.com, promoted by clinical psychologist Neil Warren; PerfectMatch.com, promoted by sociologist Pepper Schwartz of the University of Washington; and Chemistry.com (a recent spin-off of Match.com), promoted by anthropologist Helen Fisher of Rutgers. But not one of the tests they offer has ever been subjected to the type of outside scientific verification that I have described.
Why would a major company such as eHarmony, which claims to have 12 million members, not subject its scientific, 29-dimension test to a scientific validation process? In 2004 eHarmony personnel did present a paper at a national convention claiming that married couples who met through eHarmony were happier than couples who met by other means. Typically such a paper would then be submitted for possible publication in a peer-reviewed journal. But this paper has still not been published, possibly because of its obvious flawsthe most problematic being that the eHarmony couples in the study were newlyweds (married an average of six months), whereas the couples in the control group (who had met by other means) were way past the honeymoon period (married an average of 2.1 years). (eHarmony personnel, including its founder, Neil Warren, did not respond to requests to be interviewed for this article.)
In 2005, using eHarmonys own published statistics, a team of credible authoritiesamong them Philip Zimbardo, a former president of the American Psychological Associationconcluded in an online white paper: When eHarmony recommends someone as a compatible match, there is a 1 in 500 chance that youll marry this person. Given that eHarmony delivers about 1.5 matches a month, if you went on a date with all of them, it would take 346 dates and 19 years to reach 50% chance of getting married. The team also made the sweeping observation that there is no evidence that scientific psychology is able to pair individuals who will enjoy happy, lasting marriages.
Think about how difficult this task is. Most online matching is done, for example, by pairing up people who are in various respects. But you do not need to look farther than your own family and friends to know that similarity is not always a good predictor of success in a relationship. Sometimes opposites really do attract. How could an online test possibly determine whether you should be paired with someone similar or with someone different, or with some magic mix?
And even if validated predictive tests eventually appeared online, how could such tests possibly predict how two people will feel when they finally meetwhen that all-important comes into play? Oddly enough, eHarmony does not even ask people about their body type, even though research shows unequivocally that physical appearance is important to both men and women.
But the biggest problem with online testing is the false negative problem. A test that determines in advance whom you might meet and whom you will never meet necessarily fails to allow certain people to meet who would adore each other. The good news, though, is that according to psychologist Larry D. Rosen of California State University, Dominguez Hills, In our studies only 30 percent of the people say they use [online tests] at all, and most of those people find them ridiculous.
High Hopes and Poor Odds
Advertising materials from the largest online dating servicesMatch, eHarmony, True.com and Yahoo! Personalssuggest that more than 50 million Americans are now using such services (assuming relatively little overlap in membership) and that satisfaction levels are high. But recent independent studies suggest that only 16 million Americans were using online dating services by late 2005 and that satisfaction levels were low. Based on a phone survey with more than 2,000 people, Jupiter Research reports that barely one quarter of users reported being very satisfied or satisfied with online personals sites. Another extensive survey conducted by Pew Internet American Life Projects suggests that 66 percent of Internet users think that online dating websites is a dangerous activity.

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Is it worth it, saving a friendship just for old times sake. I think being with friends with someone means you put a lot of your secrets and tiny bits of yourself on the line. You give them a little about you, they give you the same, it's all mutual. They could run away with parts of you and never return. Then you slowly start to be more vulnerable but it's the trust that pulls the whole thing together.

But then what happens when you start losing the need to tell the other person things, and what if you feel like you can't be bothered to put anymore of yourself out there. Maybe before there used to be so many things you feel like if you don't tell her, it will be a dead weight on your shoulders, but now you feel that keeping to yourself would be so much easier. But you know you've been friends for awhile. So do you just do continue to push yourself to be nice?

To say that we are super close friends is such a lie. Because honestly, I think you know what you said behind my back. If it wasn't for old times sake and I still loved you, I don't think I would have cared anymore.

Have you ever paused reality, and taken a look back at the history of your life. The good times, the bad times, the hopes, the disappointments, the love in a newly found friend, the pains of fighting because of something small, misunderstanding, hatred. And after all the dust have settled, the most frustrating thing is that as much as you cannot stand someone for whatever reason it may be, you know that etched somewhere deep inside the bottom of your nonsensical heart, you can't deny that somehow, you still love the person, nonetheless. I mean lots of things happen in a fit of anger and confusion, as angry as you get, do you really hate the person? Or are you just, angry? I'm so wishy washy and I'm the queen of brittle friendships, which is kind of sad. Have you ever sat down and think of people who've walked in and out of your life for whatever reasons, known, unknown, and reflect upon what really happened, and how much your honest self you really missed having fun with the person? Like remember all the texts to and fro that kept us going through everyday, secrets shared, crisis after crisis..

What is it to compare what you thought before and what you thought now. It's like, how you like to invite her to your wedding, how you mention her so much to your boyfriend and then like two weeks later your boyfriend is like hey, I realized you don't talk so much about the person anymore and your life has totally changed focus.

I'm sorry to anyone who I've ever talked bad about. I'm really trying to change. I want to make people around me happier. I'm going to stay away from who they asked me to, because I know they're the ones that knows what's best for me, and I'll be a better person. I will be a better person and my life will be happier. Do you believe me.

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Nww York Air Show at Jones Beach State Pak on May 23 and 24 will feature the U.S. AAir Force Thunderbirds and the Canadian Snowbirds.
Plans weee scratched for ship s in Brooklgn, but the big shipc dcjed in Manhattan and Staten Island will b e availaboe fir public tours throufh the week.
Thhe viwiting ships for Fleet Week 2009:
Manhattan:
USS Iwo Jima (LHD 7)
USS Roosevelt (DDG 80)
SStaten Island:
USS Vella Gulf (CG 72)
USS Thun derbolt (PC 12)
USS Tempest (PC 2)
U SS Hurricane (PC 3)
HMCS Fredericton
HMCS Athabaskan
HMCS Preserver
HMCS Montreal
HMCS St. Johns
Picture provided to NewYorkology by Intrepid Sea, Air Space Museum/Rubenstein.

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My name is Michelle and I created this blog, Top Secret Fitness. If you’re reading this I’m glad that you want to learn more about me. I’m 30 yrs old and my job is working as a Realtor. For a long time I never thought I would need to exercise because growing up I was always too busy hanging out with my friends. I remember that my parents would always tell me that I ate very bad and I needed to look “healthier.” Nonetheless, as time went by I eventually looked “healthy,” and I was happy with my body. This was throughout high school and so on. I never had issues about the way I looked, I just was not happy a lot of the time.
I’m originally from New York, Brooklyn Staten Island. I moved to South Florida back in 1998 and since then it’s been a total life change for me. Before moving to Florida working out eating healthy was the last thing on my mind. Even though I was pretty active, I can remember waking up some mornings eating chocolate pudding, bowls of cereal, bagel with tons of cream cheese on it for breakfast. Lunch would be fast food, junk food, pint of pork fried rice (I’d eat it all). Dinner would mainly be pasta and bread, I come from an Italian family, so you know just how much pasta I was eating. My God how did I do it? I think of it now how I used to eat and I still can’t believe it. HORRIBLE!!
When I moved to Florida I knew my wardrobe would consist of shorts, skirts and tank tops. Oh yeah, can’t forget the bikini.. So that right there gave me a wakeup call and got me motivated to get in shape. Not knowing where to begin I finally decided to join a gym hire a personal trainer for 6 weeks to help me get a program going and teach me what I needed to be doing. I told him my goals were to lose weight, tone up and eat more healthy. I told him what my eating habits were like right there as I saw his face in amazement, I knew I had to stop eating all this crap. That was my main problem. So, he designed a workout program for me and gave me some nutritional information like what foods to eat and all that good stuff.
After 6 weeks of training with my trainer and my dedication to eating better I saw some great results and from that point on I was hooked. So, now I’m on my own and I have to go to the gym all by myself, I was scared at first but I kept telling myself it will get easier. I remembered all the workouts we’ve done, what body parts to train, on what days. I was now eating egg whites for breakfast, if I ate a bagel I’d make sure I scoop out all the dough, Low Carb protein shakes, lunch would be grilled chicken, salads, vegetables. I love broccoli, never ate it before but I love it now. Dinner would be grilled chicken, lean steaks and my veggies. I was really strict in the beginning, cut out white bread replaced it with whole wheat bread, no fried foods, all the bad stuff you can think of I stopped eating it.  It wasn’t easy at first, I messed up a lot, trust me at times I wanted to give up. But as time went by it just became a lifestyle change for me, I stopped worrying about the word “Diet” . I am so much more happier when I am eating right, I wouldn’t want to feel any other way.
Cardio was very important in the beginning, I was doing 30 mins 5-6 days a week. And I was killing it, I wasn’t doing no easy cardio, I was sweating my butt off. Running on the treadmill, doing the elliptical machine, climbing the stair climber (StepMill) always upping the resistance making it more challenging.
I got so into fitness I started reading every fitness magazine, buying every book you can think of. I got so into working out that I went and got certified to be a Personal Trainer. The changes that I saw inspired me to want to help others.
I workout now because it makes me not only look good but it also makes me feel so good on the inside. When I leave the gym I know I’ve accomplished something. When I miss a day or 2 I’m not so happy. But I’ve learned that I worked very hard to get to where I am today and now it’s all about maintaining it and staying happy.
Being in shape is something I believe we should all be doing because we only live once in this world. Eating healthy while enjoying the taste of food is also important to me. I’m totally against deprivation and crash dieting. Eating is good for you if you choose the right foods! Feeling good about oneself is another thing that I deeply believe in, because if you don’t feel good about yourself, you don’t care what you consume into your body which then leads to living an unhealthy life. So with this blog I really hope to help those who feel unhappy about themselves get out of that and feel good about themselves.
Please note: I may not be a professional, but I’m very passionate about the topic of health and fitness. I recommend a lot of things on my site, and will never promote anything that will hurt myself thus others. This blog is purely for informational purposes only and should not be used as medical advice. Always go to your doctor should you decide to participate in any of the workouts I discuss on my site, for your benefit.

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DJ, producer and creator of the So, Happy in Paris? parties, (monthly Queen Alcazar residencies) Michaël Canitrot has been chosen to create soundtracks for the famous red carpet climbing up the steps for the stars at the Cannes Film festival this year. For someone who has become very much in demand for the creation and direction of custom sound designs for luxury brands such as Dior, Cartier, Versace, DG, Prada, and the Crazy Horse cabaret, this is an amazing step up! And if anyone can Canitrot ‘Cannes’ Awdio.com will be following Canitrot and streaming his sets live as he spins at some exclusive parties during the festival.

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slot. Mother Nature is ruthless in her approach to life, in that she only allows the fittest to survive and the trend we see today is her reaction to the effects of a diet that is clearly not suited to the wellbeing of the human body and mind. We only have to stop, take a step in back and look around us to see that there is one hell of a serious problem. There is no need for statistics, reports or media news to tell us such. Its clear that we as individuals have to make a change in what we do if we have any intention to reverse the current obesity trend. The ultimate responsibility lies with each and every one of us to act for the benefit of ourselves.
We have to accept the fact that the grocery industry is a host of contradiction in that it sells both dietary products along side the very products that cause us to be overweight or obese in the first instance. This is so obvious in our supermarkets today. It has become human nature that profit has a higher weighting than human health, and this is evident in many industries around the world, and is far from unique within dieting circles. We must also bear in mind the diet companies, whilst they portray an air of interest and concern, in reality they are totally dependent on your failure to diet for their very own business survival. If they were good at what they do their businesses would surely fail. So who can we trust aside from ourselves. The evidence is clear there is no debate.
We may have one reprieve but it will be sometime in the future, but not now. Science and technology is getting nearer and nearer to the possibility of a wonder drug with the everincreasing understanding of the human genotype and genetic engineering. But in reality, who would ever wish or want to be dependent on diet drugs, potentially an ongoing daily basis, simply because of a lack of understanding about the relationship between the food our body has been designed for, and the food we eat. Why is it, we knowingly overeat when we know it is bad for us and that we are doing harm to ourselves? Why is it, that the only time we choose to ignore our food is the time when we are eating it!
So, is it a psychological thing, a physical thing or is it both?
In order to answer this we must first look at the change in our diet over the last 50 years. Consumption trends of refined carbohydrates such as sugar has risen dramatically, but at the same time the consumption of fats and proteins has remained reasonably stable. Saturated fats has indeed become and still is a problem although thankfully now overall consumption of saturated fats has dropped slightly, but still remains an issue.
Many studies particularly those associated with research in how the Atkins diet worked revealed that the effect of refined carbohydrates and fats both have a form of addiction associated with them. Studies have shown that refined sugars have the effect of playing havoc with the fine balance of maintaining the level of glucose in the bloodstream. This in turn has a detrimental effect on our hormonal activity, such as insulin and glucagon which are both responsible for maintaining the level of glucose to its normal level following a surge intake of refined carbohydrates in our diet. These acceptable levels of glucose in the bloodstream are maintained at surprisingly narrow margins.
Refined sugars therefore induces excessive hormonal activity in its attempt to restore homeostasis. These unnatural swings in hormonal activity often cause differing mood swings from that of being happy and content to being sad, on edge, and even feelings of anxiety or panic.

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Copyright 2009 Lusty LibraryShells of Remembrance(For Him, Taken Too Young)You came to me on a sweet honey tideSmooth waves giving my lonely heart a rideSo gently lapping on my barren shoreClearing all scars of the others before.The sun overflowed diamonds all day longButterflies and birds brought color and songMy secret tide pools all eddied and swirledYour turbulent heart relaxed and unfurled.

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‘I Got the Ring in Afghanistan’
NEW YORK February 15 2009 – While the rest of the entertainment world may be abuzz with news that Justin Guarini is getting hitched we aren’t exactly falling out of our seats. Why not? Because we already fell out of seats four months ago – when the pop star broke the news of his engagement to longtime gal pal Reina Capodici on his BlogTalkRadio show.
At the time Justin recounted how he got down on one knee and asked Reina to be his wife: “I’d actually gotten the ring when I was in Afghanistan…I had to keep it hidden for quite some time because I knew I was going to propose to her sometime soon. And then I got this gig at Disney. So I’m like Dinsey’s the place where dreams come true. So why not – it’s my dream and hers.
(Fast forward to Justin and Reina at Disney’s Hollywood Studios in Orlando Florida where he was working on The American Idol Experience.)
“There was this beautiful fireworks display…And about halfway through I’m getting a little nervous…So I turn to Raina and I say ‘I love you. I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else.’ So she’s like ‘That’s really sweet honey’…So then we start kissing…And then I break out the box and I get one knee and I say ‘Will you marry me?’”
And how did Reina react? You’ll have to download the show to find out.

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Swine flu test results from three of at least 10 sick Rucker Elementary School students came back negative late Thursday night, and the Santa Clara County Public Health Department approved the school's reopening Monday.
The three tested students included one 10-year-old girl in the fourth grade who fell severely ill Monday and left the rural school north of Gilroy, said Gilroy Unified School District Superintendent Debbie Flores. A couple others followed immediately, and those three exhibited severe flu symptoms - including vomiting and diarrhea - but they tested negative for swine flu and are now recovering. After reviewing the results and consulting with the district, county doctors decided this morning to investigate the students' illnesses, but they agreed to reopen the school because there was no evidence of swine flu. Shutting down a school requires the presence of at least one probable case.
Federal health officials believe the flu, which regularly affects pigs but rarely humans, originated in Mexico, and they are concerned because it is a new virus for which people have little or no immunity and no vaccine. The flu has been confirmed in 13 countries in at least 367 cases of swine flu, including more than 140 people in the United States, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the World Health Organization.
Friday was also opening day at the Arturo Ochoa Migrant Farmworker Center off Arizona Circle in southeast Gilroy, and by mid-afternoon, county health officials there had screened about 95 of 100 incoming families coming from Arizona, Texas, California and, in lesser numbers, Mexico, according to Chris Finn, Sthe county's assistant nurse manager, and Alex Sanchez, executive director of the Housing Authority of Santa Clara County - which oversees the state-run quarters.
Bottles of hand sanitizer sat on tables and masks and gloves were also available for arriving families, but as of 3 p.m. Friday, nobody had been referred for follow-up testing, Finn said. The mobile, RV-like county health clinic she and three others worked out of arrived this morning, but it spent the afternoon idling outside a crowded waiting room where the screening took place.
"It's just the flu," incoming resident Art Urrutia said as his grandson ran around the nearly full parking lot while families unpacked their cars. "I'm not worried. I've heard some things here and there, down by Mexicali, but nothing here."
Urrutia and his wife, daughter and two grandchildren said they felt fine after their trip from Arizona, where they said he spends about seven months of the year before driving here to find him work as a mechanic. Of the 260 or so people expected to arrive, about 100 will be children who will enter district schools until summer vacation. The camp shuts down Nov. 20, and Gardner Family Health Network also has a mobile clinic that regularly visits the seasonal quarters.
Kaiser Permanente has been following direction from the CDC by screening people who believe they have swine flu over the phone before telling them to come in to clinics, nearly all of which have set up ad hoc rooms and tents for patients suspected to have swine flu.
"Otherwise, if you're not feeling well, just stay home," Kaiser Spokesperson Karl Sonkin said.
Not one probable case has surfaced in Gilroy or its schools, and Superintendent Flores let out a cautious "phew" when she about the negative results this morning.
"It's a major relief the first few were negative because one of the children had all the symptoms, and the other two were very ill," Flores said Friday, adding that fall and winter flu outbreaks commonly remove 10 children from the school of about 640 students. "This looks like a different influenza, and we were being very cautious Thursday when we decided to close the school."
The district has forwarded the names of the seven additional students showing flu symptoms to the county, Flores said. Some of the students have been hospitalized and have been lying in bed at home. The kids' guardians have taken all seven to see doctors, but it is up to them and county officials to work out medical solutions, Flores said.
"We're asking the children to see doctors, and so far they have complied, but at that point it's a medical call," Flores said. "Hopefully now, with three days off, we'll have fewer children sick on Monday, and we'll be reducing the risk at school" on Monday with common sense hygiene practices.
The county analyzes swabs and cultures of "possible cases" taken at local health clinics. If the results come back positive for type A flu virus, the case is labeled "probable" and forwarded the samples to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta, Ga., for confirmation.
In addition to the classroom disruption, the school district decided Thursday - after waiting 36 hours too long for the test results because of an unrelated swab error - to cancel this year's Run for Fitness, an annual exercise event of about 2,000 students to raise fitness awareness. The event at Luigi Aprea Elementary School will be rescheduled soon. No other events have been postponed, Flores said.
The county health department's precautionary closure of Rucker was the first such school closure in Gilroy and the sixth in the county. The decision came as officials were waiting for test results from Saint Louise Regional Hospital. The initial swab analysis taken there from the 10-year-old girl in the fourth grade was inconclusive and had to be retaken, and county officials thus labeled the suspected sample a "high priority" Thursday, said Molly Carbajal, a health department spokesperson. Saint Louise representatives refused to comment.
The sick Rucker students were mostly fourth graders but included at least one first grader, according to Rucker Principal Barbara Keesaw, who said "a couple" of students' families visited Mexico during spring break two weeks ago. The closure did not affect state standardized testing, which will resume when the school reopens Monday, Flores said.
When Rucker closed at its normal time Thursday - an hour or so after the county decided to close the school - Melissa Valdez, who takes care of a first grader after school, said she thought the health department should shut down the whole school district, which serves about 10,000 students. She also questioned the prudence of closing just one school, whose students are bused in from different areas in and around Gilroy - unlike other neighborhood schools.
"These are not just the country kids. These are kids from all around Gilroy," Valdez said as she held a bright pink letter that Flores wrote to guardians about the closing.
Lisa Muzzio appreciated the prompt notifications and advice from the school district - which reportedly bought up all the hand sanitizer at Costco Thursday afternoon - but she said she would stay calm, continue to practice common sense hygiene and encourage her sons in fifth and second grade to do the same.
"I'm not going to panic. There's no sense to that," Muzzio said.
Councilman Perry Woodward was down in Mexico with his wife and two young children in Cabo San Lucas this week, which sits at the southern tip of the Baja Peninsula. The professional pilot with a private plane housed in San Martin took a commercial flight to Mexico Monday before the CDC issued travel precautions, and he said Wednesday people "were still partying," but in thinner crowds than usual.
Down in Mexico City, Gilroy High School teacher Gretchen Yoder-Schrock is on a Fulbright exchange, but her life and those of her two kids "have been radically altered" after schools across the country closed April 24. She washes her hands about 30 times a day, but there's not a lot to do - concerts and other public events in Mexico City are canceled, restaurants only sell food to go, and movie theaters, gyms, and pools are closed.
"Its been nearly a week that we've been cooped up but we are staying entertained," Yoder-Schrock wrote in an e-mail. "Thank goodness for the Internet!"
Staff writer Sara Suddes contributed to this story.

WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING
-"Give us time to get the results. We don't want people panicking." - GUSD Superintendent Debbie Flores
-"In hindsight, I should've taken my plane." - Councilman Perry Woodward, a pilot speaking from Mexico about his impending commercial plane trip home
-"Right now we're treating this as a suspected case." - County health department spokesperson Molly Carbajal talking about one of seven Rucker students who have flu-like symptoms
-"I'm not going to panic. There's no sense to that." - Lisa Muzzio, mother of two Rucker students

Masks: What to look for
-According to a Consumer Reports blog (blogs.consumerreports.org/health), wearing a mask "makes sense" for people who are likely to be exposed to the virus, such as someone caring for a sick person.
-Consumer Reports advises looking for a mask labeled N-95 or higher, which means it has been cleared by the FDA. If you choose to wear a mask, it should fit tightly over your nose and mouth with no gaps. For the most effectiveness, masks need to be worn as long as you're in a high risk situation and replaced after each use.
-Masks are no replacement for other preventative measures, such as frequent and vigorous hand washing.

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A woman who used tme micro-blogging network to announce het plans to commit suicude by tweeting atcress Demi Mooe was later found by authorities and tqken in for evaluatiln aftfer followers of the actress reported hte incident to police, who saud this is an unprecedented kse of the network.
Known only by her Twitter username, the Silicon Valley, Calif., resident wrote a message to Moore early Friday morning detailing the way in which she was planning to take her life.
Getting a knife, w big one that iq sharp. Goiing to cut my arm dow ghe whole arm so it doesnt wwate time, Sandieguy wrote at approximately 3 a.m. California time.
Seconds later, Sandieguy followed up with another message reading, gbye gonna kill myself now.

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By the way ie any of you perverts are xubscribers to Penthouse Magazine, keep an eye out for th e 2009 MLS found table article with Juxn Pablo Angeel, Tatlor Twellman, Greg Lalas and myself. I cant speak for tne other guys but I am kind of impressde with mhself for getting into Penthouse without having t shave my crotxh or write a letter (and dont even frknt tjat you domt know whah kinc of lettef In talking about). Yss, xli tnis blogging hqs truly paid off.
If youre not a regular reader of the venerable nudie mag (or if you arent about to fess up to it) its the May issue and its on newsstands now.

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Nunc dolor. Proin aliquam, orci nec scelerisque accumsan, nunc sem dignissim pede, nec malesuada sem ligula ac sapien. Etiam quis purus a libero lobortis viverra. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Aenean nec justo ac sapien placerat posuere. Nullam ut eros. Praesent pellentesque. Sed lacinia suscipit sem. Proin lobortis risus ornare diam. Nulla libero. Duis egestas elementum risus. Aliquam gravida lectus non mauris placerat sollicitudin. Proin sed lacus a tortor convallis suscipit. Ut vitae lorem.

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Last night I watched the old 1969 musical Paint Your Wagon, which featured one of the very few positive portrayals of a polyamorous relationship in any popular film.  Since as a psychologist I happen to know something about the research on poly relationships, namely that they can be healthier in many ways than traditional nuclear relationships, I find it interesting that so few film or literary portrayals of these relationships exist.  Then of course, theres also the point that so predictably, by the end of the film this tender, indeed quite wonderful picture of a poly marriage between two men and one woman has to be completely dismantled, with the surviving couple embracing traditional one woman, one man marriage.
The ending doesnt ring true, of course.  The tenderness and vitality of the threesome and the vitality and health of the community of miners who support and embrace their marriage, feels like the thing the writers really believed in.  As the mining town collapses into the ground upon the arrival of the preacher and the good people who show up to colonize and wreck the place, we have a fleeting image of one of the collapsing buildings, bearing the sign Garden of Eden.  The film is deeply subversive in the good sense of that term it lays out an alternative vision of a truly beautiful form of existence found seldom in our culture, and the implied question, behind the false commercial ending, is why not?
But as any writer with experience knows, they would have never made the film if it ended with a happy three-person marriage intact.  While most great literature is inclined to be subversive and you might say, constructively sociopathic, most commercial success depends on drowning those creative little kittens in a basket under a cold, deep stream of green.  Just as the only marketable solution to Paint Your Wagon was let one of the guys go off alone and to force the other two to smile and say they really prefer him gone, you may have to spend a lot of time with your agent wrassling your subversions into a form that will seem marketable.  How to do this and not lose your own vision?
(If you are very lucky, youll have an agent and/or editor who really supports your vision they dont steer you into something more and never lecture you about what the other kids are selling; rather, they and you will engage this question together and in depth.)
The problem for a writer is first viewed mainly from their own point of view as a person.  As a writer, you probably tend to be something of an outsider, a marginal observer more than a red-blooded full participant in your family, community, culture.  And you have a vivid imagination and so if you ask what if? questions, you can start to have fun filling in the blanks.  What if two men loved one woman and they wouldnt accept the necessity of duels or grief to solve the problem?  What if space aliens really did land here?  What if Washington lost the revolutionary war?  Get most writers going on those kinds of questions, and they can immediately start to fill in the hypothetical often with what feels to them like improved visions of what might have been.
But selling it is another thing.  Two categories of reasons for this tend to be cited: political and commercial.  While the commercial reasons are generally simple in concept s great, kid, but itll never sell the political may be less familiar but equally important to writers.
is shorthand for what in real life is the counterpart of the The Matrix its the complex network of institutions and their ways of controlling things in our world, including how we even see and experience our world, which exists to maintain the current power relationships.  Political includes formal like the government (who can fine a wardrobe malfunction or cordon off protest speakers), religious organizations that try to influence policy, and politicians who seek to enforce or create restrictive laws.  (Political forces are also shaped by the commercial many if not most of our laws are engineered by corporations for their own profit-seeking motives.)
Most of all, forces include the active participation of anyone in our society who reacts against threats to the status quo: if you say a word at a party, voice a suspiciously different opinion at church, or wear the wrong clothes to the club, somebody somewhere will take it upon themselves to let you know and try to make you change.  Not always, and seldom consciously doing it as a self-appointed town marshall, but they will have an unconscious of their own to somehow let you know youre straying too far, buddy.  And you only need to be about ten percent of the time for the lessons to affect you on a deep unconscious level.
Your agents, your editors, the people you pitch a script to, all work within the confines of this political and commercial matrix.  If anything, they probably know their way around the matrix far better than you do.  If youre lucky, or work in a genre where different is good this may not create a crippling set of problems for you in getting your voice out there.  But since real life is never like the fantasy, the most successful writers will generally have to find some way to navigate the matrix.
One clue to doing so may be based on going beyond the usual political or commercial theories.  Meaning, understanding something about the psychology of conservatism.  Im not talking about merely the brand of conservatism, though it includes this too. (And reducing all conservatism to evil fucking blowhards wont help you think this through.) Rather, its useful to think about the psychological needs and difficulties that lead not just right wingers but most people to generally prefer the familiar versions of reality in their stories, whether stories are movies or books or those magazine pieces on five ways to get the gerbils out of your shoes that are the bread and butter of many writers.
A simple key to understanding this is to see your job as a writer as that of filling in gaps.  Because the thing that makes people uneasy about, say, a story about a polyamorous relationship, is what then?  Just as, when I was a kid, my father gently explained that I should not consider dating black girls because nobody will accept the children, most people dont understand how to think about your wonderful, alternative version of how life could be because they just can not imagine how it will play out as well as the way of doing things.  What then?  What will your little half-black baby do?  What will happen to a poly family after the movie ends?
And if they cant imagine the answers to those questions, they simply will not accept the story.
Or they will fill in the blanks with the available stock visions, and once that happens, your vision may be sunk simply because the stock versions are not what you had in mind, and odds are, theyre not at all pleasant.
Take poly relationships.  The current dominant vision of polyamory is a pretty unappealing one: a gristly 99 year old Mormon humping a dozen thirteen year old semi-retarded slave wives pretty much captures it.  Who (other than 99 year old Mormon geezers) wants that?  If that is the only possible version of what might be, your partially completed vision of an alternative community of polyamorous good people will be very hard to market.
People cant help but fill in the blanks, generally with very stereotyped fillers.  Writers may forget that most people are not like them theyre not good at imagining or constructing new and more satisfying resolutions to the what then? questions.  For most of your potential readers, it may not be obvious how this will play out, how it will work.  In fact, for the most part, your readers dont really like ambiguity.
Psychological researchers are now saying that future conservatives were most often children who were more anxious than average about having things be structured and predictable.  They needed things more orderly, and would be uncomfortable otherwise.  Which is sad, but not necessarily evil.
Living deep within your audience like a possessing demon, the conservative tendency will gnaw at them for closure, certainty, and above all, predictability.  Your vision has to somehow mesh with their usual, preferred story.  Good guys win, bad guys are punished.  None of this there was something good in the criminal or the good guys were morally corrupt too shit.  They just wont have it.  End of story. (End of story is, you may have noticed, a favorite argument-ender of right wing pundits and mentalities.  In saying end of story one is really saying now we have closure and a version of the I like, everything is tidy, there are no loose ends, so stop talking. Conservative thinking distilled into a single phrase, that.)
What this all implies is that if you are a writer with an alternative view of what reality can be, your job is to fill in the gaps. Dont let them end the story in their usual way.  Show (dont tell too scary) your readers what might be.  Flesh it out.  Make it work and above all, align your vision of alternative ways of living or thinking with the values you probably do share with your conservative audience: justice, truth, love, creativity, whatever.  Showing frightened people how fire works is, in the end, more constructive than just yelling at them that they are scared of a little light and warmth.
This is what successful writers do.  Often, the simplest way to put it is that they show the character from the inside, and this appeals to at least a critical mass of open readers who may feel, yeah, hes different from me, but I get it.
And dont forget your other ally: the other inside the reader who is, herself or himself, and open to, and even hungry for alternative visions, deeper understandings, new ways of seeing and feeling.  Forget this half of the equation and everything Ive said can come off as far more condescending to the dumb brutes than I mean it to.  I, too, like the familiar a lot of the time. Much of life functioning at all depends on a 90% familiar experience most days.
I wish Paint Your Wagon ended at the that is still built into the recording of the film.  Three people love each other, adapt to each other, solve problems together, and we can leave them to their life.

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smoking is the way I relax.  I went and sat in the park with a book - but couldnt read it because my mind was going too fast.
Have come to the realisation my Nans death was more than a good thing, I mean - yes, it is still very sad but we all knew its what she wanted and has wanted for a really long time, so I guess in a way its nice to know she has been granted her wish - she is in a better place, and as a friend of mine said shes probably running around flirting with her Husband! That was such a nice thought, but it made me cry.  Have been alot more spritely today - as I mentioned, I got all of my tears out last night, I take on my Dads front in a sitatuion like this and try and be tough, but do allow myself to break down if necessary - thought Id be all good, but as soon as I walked into work my boss asked if I was ok and I just started crying again, 20 minutes later I came out of the toilets with eyes looking like big round Jaffa Lollies.  Haha. Even when I think about it now, I cant cry anymore - I feel more relieved than anything that she is where she has wanted to be for so long.  I am not looking forward to the funeral, I am hoping it will be on Friday - I know this may sound selfish but I dont want to have to spend the weekend worrying about having to go to a funeral early next week.
BW came over last night, asked him if he wouldnt mind coming over - think he realised how upset I sounded on the phone when he got there think he didnt want to actually be there, it was hot and we dont have air con, he does.  I had 2 beers by the time he had arrived, so about 20 minutes after he got there I fell asleep on the rumpus room floor.  It was so hot, I wet 2 towels and laid them down on the bed and cranked the ceiling fan - and had the best nights sleep.  Think BW is awkward in these situations, doesnt really know what to do, he asked me Dad last night Hows it goin and didnt offer condolences, I was going to say something but then realised he hasnt even offered me condolences, so Im guessing its hard for him to approach such a subject, he did ask when the funeral will be - so I presume he wants to come to that.
Anyway enough doom and gloom, I am feeling positive, it is a situation I cannot undo and therefore I have greived and should move on.
Forgot to have Optislim shake today, remembered at 3pm! woops - must of been the smokes - surpressed my appetite at lunchtime! had it, so you wouldnt think id be hungry now until dinner.  Having chicken with veggies and brown rice (joy! - I am sooo craving a big mcchicken burger, oooh yum!). Am constantly forgetting my 2L of water each day, am going to have to bring a big 1L bottle and drink 2 of them even though the water cooler is right behind me I still forget. will go get one now got a small one, will be sure to not remember to refill.
Going to BWs tonight for a swim, hopefully will still be hot when I get there. He has gone to get the dinner - bless.
Lady just came in for a PA interview, I have to set the sceneI am working away, in walks this lady, she is wearing a mismatched blue suit (jacket and pants are different shades of blue) her hair is a mess, its in a high ponytail and lazily clipped into a banana clip - eew didnt banana clips go out after their big rage in 1998?  She is wearing not much make up - but is making up for it on her lips where she has placed layer upon layer of coral lipstick, which she has probably unknowingly got ALL OVER HER TEETH aswell! She is interviewing for the PA to a guy who is the sleekest guy - always dresses well in designer, has Gucci or Bvlgari cufflinks on everyday (My faves are the Chanels, and the Bvlgaris with the opal centres - Im hoping one day he will give them to me!).

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dating sites like Yahoo! Personals (singles dating) and eHarmony (soulmates) focus on one type of relationship only. The advantage of choosing a dating service thats dedicated to a particular type of relationship is that everyone will be on exactly the same page as you are in terms of intentions.
If youre not clear what your intentions are, you might be better choosing a dating service where members can pursue different types of relationships within the same site. Again theres no shortage of choice. However, at some multi-relationship services its not immediately clear whos looking for what and up to you to figure it out, using the search tools. If this sounds like trouble (and it can be), choose a service like Lavalife which has separate communities within the site for each type of relationship.
Think about the type of person you want to meet. Are you open-minded, in which case a mainstream service will be fine, or do you have a lengthy list of must haves regarding your perfect match?
If you have set ideas about the type of person youd like to meet, finding them in a mainstream service could be like looking for the proverbial needle in a haystack. (By, I mean that members are as diverse as the general population.) Instead, consider choosing a relationship service that specializes in bringing people together who have something very specific in common religion, political beliefs, ethnicity, body size, certain lifestyles, you name it.
Simply run a search for dating (or matchmaking, or marriage) plus whatever youre looking for (vegetarian, republican, biker) and its almost certain youll find a relationship service to match.
Dating sites have thousands if not millions of members so good search tools are important. However, its still up to you search out your perfect match and not everyone has time for this. Luckily many dating services have matchmaking features (more sophisticated search tools) that will help you find the one quickly and easily.
Matchmaking features range from the very simple, based on profiles and/or basic wish lists, to the sophisticated, based on personality and other tests as well as more detailed profiles and wish lists. Unless youre unusually picky (or just very unusual), these one-click options will typically churn up a good selection of possible matches on a regular basis popular dating services attract many new members a day. You can usually opt to have these matchmaking searches run automatically on a regular basis and receive new match details by email another time-saver.
At some services, matchmaking features are part of a complete matchmaking service where the selection process is much stricter, usually because theyre geared towards serious relationships. Typically youll receive just a handful of potential partners over a length of time. For example, eHarmony (designed to help people into marriage) advises clients not to expect more than one or two matches a month. To accept this level of matchmaking you have to be happy with the idea of letting the have the final say about whos right for you and whos not.
Online dating services are about much more than dating. Theyre also an opportunity to gain some valuable insights into yourself and the type of person youre looking to meet which could help improve your love life, online and off. If this appeals to you, choose a dating service with personality and other tests for members to take.
For the most part, larger, well established online dating services have the most insightful and detailed personality tests because they have more resources to put into their design. Almost all personality tests are free to take and at many sites matchmaking tools draw on the results to find members who are compatible with each other. So, by taking several tests and judging the results, youll get a good idea of which site is going to do the best job of helping you find your perfect match. After all, if the results are a true reflection of what youre like, theyll be a true reflection of potential matches too.
There are two levels of communication to consider when choosing a dating service what you get for free and what you get as a paying member. On both fronts, some services offer a lot more than others.
Free communications matter because they let you get to know someone, or at least that the interest is mutual, before you spring for a subscription. (A subscription will let you communicate as much as you like.) At most services, free communications are limited to flirty icons and preset messages that members send to each other, but search around. Some services are much more generous than others.
Once you subscribe, the norm for communicating is by on-site email and instant messaging. Many of the top dating services, Yahoo! Personals included, have stuck with this simple set up and show no sign of changing any time soon. Others, like Match.com, are continuously adopting new technologies to offer members more communications options. Typically youll pay more so think about whether or not you really need to to be able to access their services anytime, anywhere.
Think about what sort of experience youd like to have with online dating services. Do you intend to focus on finding your perfect match or would you like to enjoy other activities as well? Many services offer entertainment features including light-hearted quizzes and polls, contests, articles and newsletters, as well as chat rooms and the option to sign up to meet new friends as well as dates.
If the idea of meeting someone online then having to meet them face-to-face at some stage is a little intimidating, look for a dating service that helps members meet and mingle, casually and as part of a group, offline too. Though some dating services go as far as offering singles holidays, offline activities usually involve meeting for concerts, shows and other events in your area or elsewhere.
You can get that all-important for someone in relaxed atmosphere with plenty of food for conversation and make as much or as little of the occasion as you like. If you havent met someone yet, offline activities are an opportunity to meet someone you might like to continue chatting with online, with the advantage that youve already met.
If youre away from your native country, would like to chat in your native language or are planning to relocate or travel to a different country, some of the more established and successful online dating services have extended their services into countries other than the US. For example, Yahoo! Personals has a new Canadian service while Match.com is live in 27 different countries.
Most online dating services charge about the same for a subscription between $20 and $25 a month so cost isnt going to be much of a deciding factor when choosing a dating service. Instead, look for value services might charge about the same but there are big differences in what you get for your money. Also, check out payment options. Several dating services accept money orders and checks as well as the usual credit cards.
Find out what discounts will be available if you sign up for several months at once, and if any special offers are available. Finally on this one, look for free trials and try out all the extra subscriber features before committing to a subscription.
When youve drawn up a checklist of what youd like in a dating service (and hopefully this article has helped) choosing a dating service will be a lot easier. You can compare your checklist to dating service reviews and, for more specific details, explore FAQs, help pages and take a tour options (all good dating services have these). And dont forget, signing up is free and you can usually explore sites without having to post a profile first. Most of all, though its important to choose a dating service thats right for you, one youll enjoy using and are mostly like to have success with, choosing a dating service should be fun. If one dating service doesnt work out for you, move on and choose another.

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house or have a local licensed realtor do a BPO (Brokers Price Opinion), which indicates the current market value of the home.
You can work with a foreclosure specialist who has experience in working with short sales. The short sale negotiator will also perform a market analysis on your home to determine market value. They will help you submit other documentation to your lender to qualify you for the short sale option, including a hardship letter, financial statements, bank statements, pay stubs and other supporting information to show financial hardship and the declining value of your home.
A good short sale negotiator provides a great service to the distressed homeowner and the lender. They help the homeowner by helping them satisfy their lender with a short payoff. In addition, they will ask that the lender provide the homeowner with a document of full satisfaction so they do not come after them for the deficiency. A short sale prevents the foreclosure from proceeding and becoming a part of your credit report, resulting in damage that takes many years to repair.
If the lender is wise enough to accept a short sale offer, then he cuts his losses now, rather than risk the declining values of real estate causing him to be stuck with property that cannot be sold for near what he was owed. Chances are great that he will not sell the property at all; it will sit empty for months, become vandalized, and maybe even condemned and demolished for a total loss.
You should only consider a short sale if you feel that you have no other options. If you owe a lot more than your home is worth and you cannot meet your mortgage obligations, maybe its time to just walk away and sell the home for whatever you can get your lender to accept. You just lose more each day as you try to cover all the expenses while foreclosure is looming. A short sale saves your credit report from having a foreclosure on it while satisfying the debt to your lender. You also get to put an end to the harassing phone calls and letters from debt collectors while you make a new start.

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country. In latter years she turned into one of those crazy hoarder types who kept every newspaper, egg carton and ketchup packet she could get her hands on. Before that, though, she was simply -cheap-. When I was a kid, shed mail us one big box via last-class postage; sometimes itd get to us three weeks early, sometimes two months late. Out from the big box the year of my seventh birthday came a small package with my Xmas present: a left shoe. In an identically wrapped box with instructions not to open until my birthday five days later: the right shoe. She also cut a cardboard of Life Savers in half and included half with each ! My mother, being most kind, actually told me at the time, Obviously, you dont have to write two thank-you cards to your grandmother. Those shoes alone almost added an entire year to my therapy as an adult.
The first Christmas after we were married, my husband and I drove 8 hours to Upstate New York to spend Christmas with my in-laws. I baked homemade Christmas cookies the night before, and I brought a tin of them to share with everyone when we arrived. My mother-in-law (MIL) quickly whisked them away to the basement, saying that the rule in their house was no cookies until Christmas Eve.
I was a more than a little offended since I had taken the time to bake them the night before and Christmas Eve was a still a few days away. Who takes something a guest has brought and announces that instead of serving it, youre putting it in the basement?
I only felt better after dinner that night when my MIL pulled out a stale cake for dessert--my sister-in-law had made it a few days earlier, but MIL didnt want to serve it until we had arrived. When we went up there for Christmas last year I didnt bake anything--we brought Baileys instead.Carolyn Hax: Tally so far:
II abuse of innocent baked goods
II emotional abuse of perfectly good accessories
I death under suspicious circumstances
As I continued to replenish the trays I watched as the most expensive ingredients were being depleted at a much faster rate than I would have thought. I then realized that my Mother in Law was sneaking into the kitchen filling dinner plates with smoked salmon, caviar, and handmade (by me) gruyere cheese puffs. How does one respond to that? Why was she doing it? Because she and her son, my brother in law, were high and had the very expensive munchies. This annoyed me but what can you do, family is not always convenient. However when they proceeded to go out on the patio and light up I freaked. Have I mentioned my father is a federal judge? Oh and that one of the guests who had not yet arrived date was a DEA agent? All things all of the guests knew, as we had just been discussing the guest list. I did what any insane/sane person would have done -- I flushed the bag of weed and smashed the glass pipe with the flat side of my cleaver and tossed it into the fireplace. Most people at the party had no idea what was going on. For some people, please dont smoke in my house is not understood, but for my family apparently even fear of prosecution is not enough.For your consideration: Smash the pot pipe with a cleaver
Fa la la la la la la la la
Down the toilet with the reefer
Fa la la la la la la la la
Stoners hide from fedral agents
Fa la la la la la la la la
All check in as mental patients
Fa la la la la la la la laCarolyn Hax: Or:
Smash the pot pipe with a cleaver
Fa la la la la la la la la
Down the toilet with the reefer
Fa la la la la la la la la
Fedral agents werent the reason
Fa la la la la la la la la
This is gruyere cheese puff season.
Fa la la la la la la la laWe got into the habit of opening her gifts as part of our one-present-on-Christmas-Eve tradition, just so wed have plenty of time to get the laughter out of our systems before we called her on Christmas to thank her. The topper was the year I received a huge, gaudy metal pendant that had a giant padlock on it, with a key dangling from it. When I put it on and stood up, it hung right in front of my crotch. We all stared in silence for a moment and then someone said, Wow. Grandma got you a chastity belt.A truly kind mother would have helped you write two thank-you notes:
Dear Grandma, Thank you so much for the beautiful left shoe. It really made my Christmas fun and unique. I used it to hop all the way around the house in the snow. Whee! Love, Child.
Dear Grandma, The right shoe was great! It was a wonderful birthday surprise! My right foot happened to start to get frostbite recently, so I dont know how you knew I needed it but its just perfect! Thank you so much for the thoughtful birthday gift. Love, Child.Got my first taste of my new in-laws holiday letter this year: 2 pages, double sided, single spaced. 90% dedicated to every cough, sniffle, and case of diarrhea they endured in 2008. Significant space dedicated to one particular 6 inch pus-filled abscess. Our wedding got a brief mention at the end. Happy holidays!How timely that I have family dysfunction/holiday problem. I strongly suspect that my mother has broken into my email. Shes done this to my other siblings and shes great at guessing passwords. At Thanksgiving dinner, and apropos of nothing, she began quoting from an email I had written to my best friend, where I expressed concern about my boyfriends willingness to commit. Of course, I have never discussed this issue with my mother or any family member, so she would have no way of knowing my concerns.

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